Swing and Sway the Toxic Way?

Decisions suck! No matter which choice you make there are consequences. Even the best possible choice can have unforeseen side effects. To NOT make a choice isn’t an option. To swing and sway back and forth like a hanging sign is irresponsible.

What you should NOT do is let everyone else make your decisions for you. It’s your life and you have to live with the consequences of your decisions.

If you are allergic to seafood it would not be wise to let your sister talk you into eating dinner at a seafood restaurant and ordering shrimp because she thinks it’s best for you. Obviously she won’t be the one at the hospital when you suffer the allergic reactions. You will pay the consequences of her decision.

If you have always dreamed of being a teacher, would you go to law school because a friend thinks it’s best for you? Of course not. You will be a terrible lawyer (if you even pass law school) because your heart isn’t in it. You will miss your chance to be the best teacher the world has ever seen. Your friend doesn’t suffer from the lost dream. You do.

Your decisions shouldn’t swing and sway on the whims of others just because you don’t like to make decisions. You will be miserable because you will be living everyone else’s life but yours. You won’t be able to do what you want to do with your life.

However, don’t get me wrong. Friends and family can be a valuable help in talking through your options. They might even help you find different choices you hadn’t considered.

Helping is one thing. Telling you how to live is totally different and unacceptable. Would you be happy living with the consequences of someone else’s decision?

Minor decision, minor consequence. Major decision, major consequence – perhaps even life-long. Marrying for money, or even an arranged marriage might be a good example.

Making good decisions is part of being an adult. Dealing with the consequences of bad ones is also part of being an adult. Not swinging in the breeze of others’ decisions is being a responsible adult.

Sometimes being an adult SUCKS. But so does living someone else’s life.