Progress Along This Journey of Self-Discovery

I’ve been working on writing healing letters and it was time to write a new one to myself.  It was time to show myself how proud I am of the progress I have made on this journey of self-discovery.  Here is my letter to myself:

Dear Me,

It’s time for me to tell you how proud of you I am. You have embarked on a very difficult journey, but you are making good progress.

A year ago you had no idea what you were facing. You didn’t know what kind of hardships you might encounter along the way. Yet, you bravely agreed to attempt this journey to find yourself.

There is no road map or GPS to guide you along this journey. You can’t take along any travelling companions, for this journey you must travel alone. Loved ones can only support you and encourage you.

It’s been a bumpy road with hills and dips along the way. There have been waysides where you stopped to catch your breath. Often these are also the places where the tears caught up to you.

There has been a lot of tears along the way. There were moments of hard sobbing, when your body shook with the vibrations of your pain. But you allowed the tears to come to cleanse the hurt and pain. You didn’t try to hide it, or bury it and avoid it. I’m so proud of you!

There were some revelations you weren’t expecting and weren’t prepared for. They didn’t scare you away from your journey. You accepted them and embraced them and let them teach you. You used them to learn about yourself, secrets you never knew were there.

Some things you found were surprising. Things you thought were past you, things you were sure you had dealt with, still lingered inside causing hidden pain. You faced them head on and accepted their presence, and allowed them to hand you the pain they carried. Those things were meant to teach you, to strengthen you, and you missed those opportunities when you hid them away without feeling them. This time you felt them. I’m so proud of you!

There are still monsters ahead on this journey. You already have found some boxes of memories locked with keys you can’t find. But you know they contain pain because they are leaking too. The poison inside is still creeping out. The boxes didn’t stop the poison. It just delayed it a little. Finding those keys is part of this journey.

But you can do it! You are doing so well already. What may have thrown someone else into a tailspin is only pushing you further along in your desire to heal from these things. You are growing stronger.

There are some rough moments ahead. There will be temptations to quit, to give in and not feel any more pain. You will grow tired of crying tears and sobbing with your entire body. But you grow stronger and it will be this strength you are gaining that will keep you going on despite the pain and the tears. You can do this.

I am proud of you. And I am YOU. YOU are proud of YOU. Good job!