Healing Through Writing

These last two Saturdays I attended a writing workshop held by a friend I just met. The workshop was called “Self Discovery: Healing Through Writing”. It was a first for me. So many times I’ve seen workshops and seminars and things I would like to attend for the knowledge and the networking and I never did. Mostly I expected my husband wanted or needed my time so it wasn’t important enough for me to go. Other times, I think maybe I was a little intimidated. That old demon-thought “not good enough” punched through loud and clear and stopped me.

This time I made an exception. I’m not sure what prompted me to do it THIS time when I haven’t before, but there definitely was a good reason for it. I didn’t go alone but convinced a couple of women I knew, women in less than stellar households to just try it out. We all needed healing.  The only requirements were time and a notebook to write in.

Attendance Was Minimal

The numbers were few. Maybe there are a lot of women out there just like I was, saying, “maybe next time.” I believe it was a blessing. It gave these women in attendance a chance to feel comfortable using their voices. The group was small enough not to be intimidating.

Tears flowed. Pens flew as feelings were released. We were among kindred souls. We realized that all in attendance were empaths although that was not what the workshop was intended to be. It might have been what made it work. People are naturally drawn to opening up to an empath. They know they are in the presence of someone who will listen with a sympathetic non-judgmental ear.

The woman holding the workshop told her story of abuse beginning with her early years and on into her adulthood. I shared a few of my own experiences in dealing with narcissistic abuse at the hands of a parent. A couple of others cried as they explained how they needed to feel loved and looked in the wrong places. They were suffering for their decisions. They were abused too.

Abuse Survivors Need To Journal

The workshop was intended to help give survivors of abuse a bit of a push to begin to write journals for healing. To write free-flowing words to release the pain inside. Pain that sometimes they didn’t even realize they had. Writing just five minutes brought up tears. When tears come that quickly the pain is very close to the surface. It is raw.

I didn’t need the boost to write in a journal. I love to write in my journal and let words just flow. But what I did get out of it was a reminder that we have to help ourselves before we can help others. These other women are in crisis. They need help. Before they can begin to receive help from anyone else, they have to begin to help themselves.

The workshop was the first step. They have a long road to go. I’ll be there to help where and when I can, but I can’t force them to accept help. Even if I could it would be a waste of time for they would not have learned the lesson they need to learn.  They came away with a better understanding of what they need and what they lack and how to take the next steps to healing.  They learned the importance of writing out their feelings and frustrations and hurts. It was worth the time and effort.

I came away reminded that we have to love ourselves before we can find love in anyone else. If I don’t love me, who CAN love me? If I don’t take care of me, who will? It’s not selfish to love yourself enough to take care of yourself. It is necessary.